Do You Know

what it feel like when people is passin?
man, so i got some bad news tonight. i found out that one of my best friend's grandmas passed away. i met her a couple of times and she was so full of life. i'm taking it pretty hard because one, that's my best friend, and two, i know what it feels like to loose someone close to you, and i never wanted that to happen to one of my friends. i used to think about how i would react if i got some sort of horrible news like this, and i knew i wouldn't be able to not cry. cause i love my friends, and people in general, alot. like i care about people so much. so i called my granny and as soon as i heard her voice i started crying. i really wish i could bare this a thousand times so they wouldn't have to feel this just once. i would rather it be me having to deal with this. i know i would take it the hardest if this happened to one of my friends. man, to everyone, i love you so much, and i care about you. i love you all!

idk?

man, i feel really wierd. just like, incredibly alone. idk what it is, but i feel it. i couldn't even go to sleep last night. i got literally 3 hours of sleep. i haven't even talked to my best friend in like a week! [that's partially my fault though cause i haven't made time] ugh! i really wish i was at home. i know i wouldn't be feeling this bad. it's almost like i'm apathetic towards it. wait, i just contradicted myself, because if i'm complaining about it, it means i don't like it. and if i was apathetic, i wouldn't care. well anyway, i just needed to get that out. i really want to be there right now.